all i do is work and i love it.

i have only been working on the floor of the icu/ccu for a few weeks and i realize that i like it more than i even thought that i would. which is very exciting to me, especially with my transfer to usc coming up soon and beginning my 3 years of prep time for the mcat. i finally decided on my field of practice.. intensivist physician, and i decided to specialize in cardiothorastics. i'm excited. hah, somewhat. ask me in atleast 8 more years if i'm still excited.

everything has been going pretty well lately, except for the fact that i've been sick as hell for over a week and not had enough sleep. this weekend, bobby and i painted the last two rooms in the house that needed paint this weekend.. went up to his parents house at the lake to watch the super bowl (which sucked cause my patriots choked)

and last but not least, i'm trying to talk him into getting another dog.. but he says one is enough. i don't think so. haha.

so after a very lengthy interviewing and testing process, i finally and officially got the job in the icu on friday. i'm really excited about it.. insurance & full school scholarships, and a paycheck.. and i wear scrubs everyday, so i don't have to worry about what i'm going to wear every day.

i don't want this new year to come, but i guess i need it.
maybe it will help me feel like i've made the right decisions lately. it's just not so comforting (nor do i think it's a good sign) that i'm going into this new year alone. without him, for the first time in over 3 years. i'm kind of debating even staying at home, because despite all the invitations from friends and fun stuff that will be going on.. i deffinetely don't want to be a downer.

ugh.

maybe i should just get all alc'd up and try to forget about it all.


oh, and it's so ironic how something amazing and life changing can happen.. then in the same breath something really sad and hard, like ending your relationship with someone who just happens to be one of your best friends.. can happen as well.

why can't i just for once be completely happy? is anyone ever really happy?

finally, some good luck.

i have a very important job interview on tuesday.
it's at palmetto health baptist hospital downtown. it's a unit secretary position on the icu/ccu (intensive care unit/critical care unit) floor.

wish me luck : )

next week i absolutely, positively must find a job. i'm picky though.. no working on the weekends, pay must be atleast $8+.. and well, a lot more little specifications that most certainly do not involve wearing any type of hainous uniform.. or any uniform at all.

happy thanksgiving. i'm in north carolina.. since yesterday and until tommorrow.

has anyone else fallen in love with 'rock band' yet? david bought it on tuesday when it came out, and we played it from then until 5am on wednesday. yeah.

i'm excited to be going back to school next semester. i have registered for all my classes.. i'll have all five of my classes on tuesdays & thursdays, from 8am-6pm with a break from 1230-2pm. this way i can work all day on monday, wednesday and fridays.. and not have to drive back and forth, and so on.

today was the only day bobby's work gave him off for thanksgiving, so he stayed in columbia and went to his grandparents houses.. but atleast he got saturday off so we can go to the game. GO TIGERS! : )

i can't wait to be back in town tommorow night, and the whole rest of the weekend for another bonfire party. last weekend was amazing. and the new tile on the kitchen floor is finally done, so no more worrying about drunk people messing it up.

this was random. byeee. happy turkey day.

(i posted this on a bulletin on myspace, but wanted to put it on here too)


i can't sleep.. and i think it's because of what day it is.

i remember exactly what i was doing six years ago today. i was in drama class in middle school, and mrs. vogel turned on the tv. i was horrified, along with everyone else in my class. my dad was supposed to be flying back from a week long business trip in bermuda that morning, into the newark airport. i remember my mom coming to pick me up from school, and my family not being able to get in touch with my dad until the next day.

...and now here i am in my room in columbia, south carolina.. complaining about how i can't sleep, when i'm sure there are plenty of people across the country, and especially in new york and other big cities, that i am sure are probably even more scared than i am.

this is what makes me so angry -- the fear that i feel just a little bit everyday and that i am feeling so strongly right now, has seemed to have escaped so many people. do you remember the days after september 11, 2001.. weeks after.. months after.. how close everyone became. how mad and disgusted we all were? all of america?

well what the fuck happened?

everyone was so supportive of the war, of paying them back for what they did to our country.. and now it's like, lets pull out! who cares about all of the innocent people who died in the towers, trying to save people, or all of the soldiers who have fought so bravely for each and every one of us and lost their lives in the past six years? well damnit, i fucking care. i care about every single one of them.

i wish everyone would get mad again. remember how bad it hurt, and remember those who hurt even worse than we did. be thankful for those who are out protecting our country, so you can sit over here and bitch about how we need new leadership. get a fucking clue.


i'm exhausted.. and today is going to be a very difficult day.. but i can't even imagine how all of the people who have lost family members and loved ones are going to feel today. maybe it would make them feel just a tiny, tiny bit better.. if they knew that their fellow americans still cared, and knew that they still wanted justice too.

loves - caroline.


don't send me any negative messages.. keep it to yourself.

everything is okay.
i love my baby.


three years on october 1 :)

i feel like i don't have time for anything at all anymore.. aside from working 8 to 6, every day of the week. it is possible that i just need to learn to manage my time better.

i miss like, a million people. mostly all of whom i have completely lost touch with. you know who you are, if you read this (maybe about 3 will). call me up 467-1332.

thinking about how you used to be so tight, and best friends with someone for a long time and do absolutely everything together and be with them almost every single day.. it just fucking sucks that you can wake up one day and go, damn, we used to be cool. then you feel all weird to call them and stuff. how does that happen?

i'm tired.

last thursday to sunday, i went to myrtle beach with my boss and his family, to watch their three kids while they were at a car dealers convention. it really wasn't as bad as i thought it would be. i honestly didn't do much but sit at the pool with the kids pretty much all day every day, aside from their naptimes. the money was good too, and i deffinetely need it for school. which starts soon.. on the 20th.. ugh.

monday was my birthday, 19. yay. birthday's aren't anywhere near as great as they are when you're a kid. people actually buy you things, rather than give you money or gift cards. which aren't bad.. but how about a suprise.

it's been forever since i've updated this, i don't even know if anyone still uses this or not.

anyway, lets see. my birthday is a month from yesterday. i'm still with bobby, it's been over two and a half years. i'm still going to midlands tech, and still have no clue what i'm majoring in. i just started working downtown, as an administrative assistant and nanny to three kids. i have a 5 month old boston terrier puppy.. named pup pup that bobby bought me for valentine's day.

i guess that's it.
how's everyone doing?